opinion Archives - 国产吃瓜黑料 Online /tag/opinion/ Live Bravely Wed, 03 Sep 2025 17:28:27 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.7.1 https://cdn.outsideonline.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/07/favicon-194x194-1.png opinion Archives - 国产吃瓜黑料 Online /tag/opinion/ 32 32 Our Home Is Tiny. Is It Rude to House My Visiting In-Laws in a Camper? /culture/opinion/mountain-town-camper/ Wed, 03 Sep 2025 17:28:27 +0000 /?p=2715022 Our Home Is Tiny. Is It Rude to House My Visiting In-Laws in a Camper?

After moving into a small home in a mountain town, a reader is inundated with guests. Is it impolite to house them in a camper?

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Our Home Is Tiny. Is It Rude to House My Visiting In-Laws in a Camper?

We recently bought a house in a mountain town where we鈥檝e rented for 15 years. It鈥檚 the perfect location: within walking distance of trails in one direction, and the old downtown of this former mining town in the other. Since the COVID pandemic, this lazy town has become incredibly popular鈥and expensive. What our family of three could afford was a 100-year-old fixer-upper, 900 square feet, two bedrooms, one bathroom. Because our town is now hip, all our friends and family want to visit. And we want them to stay with us.

Over the years we often stayed with my brother-in-law鈥檚 family. They have a big house, and they always offered us a guest room with its own bathroom. We loved it and were so grateful. When they came to visit, we gave them a room, but one of them slept on the living room couch. Six people used one toilet and shower.

If they were our only guests, I might be more generous. But with all our company, it鈥檚 starting to feel like a hotel. So I鈥檝e proposed to my partner that when his brother鈥檚 family returns, we house them in the camper that we park behind the house in the alley. It has heat! It doesn鈥檛 have a toilet, but they can come into the house if need be.

But my partner thinks that would be rude, and that if we鈥檙e going to have guests, we have to house them indoors. But I argue that a hotel or Airbnb in this town costs $200 a night. They should be grateful for what we have to offer! Shouldn鈥檛 they?Location Rich, House Poor

Dear House Poor,

First, let鈥檚 breathe deep and count gratitudes. You own a functional house in a great place. You have friends and family that you like well enough to invite into your home. You have a camper! Those facts alone speak of an abundance, even if the shabby home feels like poverty.

Visiting Family Creates an Ethical Conundrum

It鈥檚 tempting鈥攋ust ask your partner鈥攖o attempt reciprocating with family. They offer you a suite, you should offer them a suite! And yet the financial reality is likely not equal. You didn鈥檛 tell me enough about their home to know if they own a large house (because they are fabulously wealthy), or because the house is in some undesirable place where real estate is cheap. It doesn鈥檛 really matter: what matters is that your partner may feel some element of envy or shame while comparing your hovel to their mansion. That鈥檚 a strong driver of behavior.

Sundog finds your camper solution both elegant and charming. Your guests have presumably traveled to your mountain town not just to see you, but also to see the mountains. Let them rough it! You may even provide a down-home chamber pot鈥攁 five-gallon plastic bucket鈥攕hould they prefer a more authentic experience. No extra charge for the privacy. Your partner and child will be much more gracious of hosts if they all get to sleep in their own beds.

If your guests prefer luxury, then they can choose one of the pricey accommodations you mention. I understand your partner鈥檚 concern that it might be uncouth, but I don鈥檛 see anything unethical in offering what you have.

Morality aside, there may be a question of legality. Some cities expressly forbid occupying motor homes in the street and driveway. And for good reason. Setting up a HipCamp in your driveway will violate laws and enrage your neighbors. There鈥檚 a big difference between letting your family stay in the Casita versus running a pirate trailer park. Let your conscience be your guide here, and if a crabby neighbor complains, you can address that when it happens.

The last thing I鈥檒l say is that there may be some intra-family dynamics here that aren鈥檛 quite at the surface. That may be between you and your partner, or between your partner and his brother. If the camper solution blows up in your face, then you鈥檒l have to confront those tensions more directly, and perhaps come up with a new plan.

Should a Reader Offer a Refund?

Recently Sundog wrote about the ethics of selling used gear that may not last, specifically an old sailboat on an old trailer. Reader LittleTug chimed in with his opinion:

I read your article on should you give back more money to the person who purchased your old boat. No offense but that is ridiculous. Everything works the day before it breaks. I am sure that you did not make it break. If you lied about something other than your opinion on its condition when you sold it (that is fraud) you should not consider giving back one penny. They just want it for free.

If you bought it would you try to get more money back? I would not. He could have had a marine surveyor check it out before he bought it.

Mark Sundeen with his truck
(Photo: Courtesy Mark Sundeen)

Mark Sundeen teaches environmental writing at the University of Montana. Got a question or a response? Send your questions and complaints to sundogsalmanac@hotmail.com

 

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I Sold My Old Boat and It Broke. Should I Offer a Refund? /culture/opinion/boat-refund/ Tue, 12 Aug 2025 15:26:50 +0000 /?p=2712419 I Sold My Old Boat and It Broke. Should I Offer a Refund?

A reader wrestles with the moral quandary of selling old gear on Craigslist or Facebook. What happens if your stuff immediately falls apart?

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I Sold My Old Boat and It Broke. Should I Offer a Refund?

Dear Sundog,

I listed an old sailboat for sale for $3,000, which happened to be the amount I鈥檇 put into it with a new engine and other repairs. No takers. I dropped the price but still nothing. Finally I slashed it to $1200, and got three buyers immediately. One guy said he’d buy it sight unseen. I was out of town when he came by and hauled it off on its trailer. Well, 19 miles later, the axle bearing shit the bed. The tire blew out, and the sparks of hot metal dragging on pavement started a small grass fire, which the guy was able to contain. The only way I know this is through a series of increasingly angry texts and photos. The buyer then paid $600 to a wrecker to haul the boat and trailer to his house. Now the buyer is texting me asking for some money back. I鈥檇 just hauled the boat and trailer a hundred miles the week before, and did not know that it had any problem. I still think the buyer got a good deal. Am I obliged to refund any of his money? 鈥 Seller B. Wary

Dear Seller,

We all know how much new equipment costs: boats, trailers, ropes or skis. It鈥檚 prohibitive! How can a semi-unemployed vagabond make it in the outback today when it costs tens of thousands for the basic outfit? We do what your buyer did, and cruise the bargain basements for steals too good to be true. But here鈥檚 the thing. It usually is too good to be true. The raft has slow leaks. The truck chassis is rusting. The thing broke in two but was repaired in the garage and will probably, almost certainly, perform good as new.

During the pandemic, a peculiar inversion occurred. When factories and shipyards shuttered, new equipment was expensive or even impossible to purchase. As a result, owners of used boats, trailers and trucks could unload their junk for nearly as much as they鈥檇 paid a decade earlier. This bubble persisted for a couple of years, and even now you鈥檒l find ambitious sellers asking retail prices for cracked, dented, leaking, rusty gear. It would appear that you, Seller B. Wary, did not fall into this category, and quickly adjusted the price of your old boat to what the market would pay.

To be sure it鈥檚 a bummer for the buyer. Blown tires, a day wasted, expensive repair, and a wildfire to boot: What a mess! These things happen to those of us foolish enough to haul trailers filled with gear around the hinterlands. Sundog himself once toppled a trailer full of kayaks on a dirt road in Baja California some two hours from the nearest town or auto garage. In this case he left the trailer, drove to a garage, and hired a mechanic to come back with him and fix the thing where it sat. The Mexican mechanic brought a chain and a block of wood and a small tool kit. Upon getting the trailer to run, he looked with satisfaction at his two hands and pronounced, 鈥淧uro mano.鈥 (pure hands).

Nonetheless, by the basic premise of the familiar slogan 鈥渂uyer beware,鈥 his problems are not your responsibility鈥擨鈥檇 add that your responsibility decreases in direct proportion to the sales price.

Sundog also learned the same lesson the hard way. His first car ever purchased was a 1969 Plymouth Fury that was already 22 years old when Sundog bought it from a trollish hippie named Bobby for $500. Having driven approximately half a mile from the point of purchase, Sundog was dismayed when he heard a loud clank followed by a thunderous roar from the V8. The exhaust line had snapped, and the muffler dragged on the asphalt.

I was pulled over by two separate cops on the short drive home, and issued a fix-it ticket. This being California, registering the Fury would have required a new exhaust system, a smog check, and God knows what else. I didn鈥檛 know how to do the work myself. I was going to have to pay hundreds鈥攖housands, maybe鈥攆ar in excess of what I鈥檇 paid for the Fury just to get the thing street legal. When I took this news to Bobby and asked for some refund, he remarked memorably if not justly: 鈥淗ey man, you can鈥檛 squeeze water from a rock!鈥

Sundog received little sympathy. When I told people I鈥檇 paid $500 for a 22 year old car that turned out to be a lemon, they said (I鈥檓 paraphrasing here): 鈥淲ell, duh.鈥

I鈥檇 imagined myself the kind of guy who could fix a car, or if not that, the kind who鈥檇 run the risk of driving around an explosively loud unregistered beast. I was neither. I ended up paying a wrecker a hundred bucks to tow the thing to a junkyard. After that, I bought better cars. Lesson learned.

You鈥檙e not obliged to refund his money, nor to pay the $600 for the tow. The buyer could have made other choices: repaired it on the side of the road. Had he towed it back the 19 miles to your house and asked for a refund, you鈥檇 have more of an obligation to take it back. If you鈥檙e going to buy decades-old gear at rock bottom prices, then you should be the type of person who knows how to repair it. Inversely, if you can鈥檛 repair equipment yourself, you should buy new or at least newer gear, with the warranties and peace of mind that comes with it. It would appear that your buyer wanted the best of both worlds: dirtbag prices with dealer assurances. It didn鈥檛 work out that way.

Indeed, your buyer got a deal that was too good to be true.

The author has doesn鈥檛 know how to sail, but he can row鈥攄oing so here on the Selway River, Idaho, in 2025. (Photo: Cedar Brant)聽

Mark Sundeen teaches environmental writing at the University of Montana.聽Got a question or a response? Email聽sundogsalmanac@hotmail.com

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The Case for Running in Whatever You’re Wearing /culture/opinion/every-shirt-running-shirt/ Tue, 08 Jul 2025 09:10:55 +0000 /?p=2710115 The Case for Running in Whatever You're Wearing

When it comes to what we run in, are we missing the point?

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The Case for Running in Whatever You're Wearing

I ran my first marathon in a basketball jersey. Not just any basketball jersey, a vintage Chris Webber Golden State Warriors number, bright blue and straight from the mid-nineties. As racers lined up at the starting line of the Sunflower Marathon in Mazama, Washington, I looked out of place next to technical T-shirts and space-age microfibers. But in many ways, that was also kind of the point: Did it really matter what I was wearing? We were all about to run the same race, did we have to look the same too?

Running is an intensely personal experience. Beyond the run club hoopla and Strava route sharing, getting up and going is an internal affair, one driven by any number of motivations, but ultimately completed by a team of one. So why, then, has running fashion (and function) become such a crowd-sourced affair?

Sweat-wicking material, temperature control technology, flat seams, lower friction points鈥攖he innovation in our outer appearance has never been as good as it is today. But it鈥檚 also intimidating. The pressure to get the exact right gear as everyone else can add an extra barrier of entry to the run game, and for some it can be a downright turnoff. Let鈥檚 be real, dropping an extra $200 on an over-designed tank top isn鈥檛 exactly screaming 鈥済o out there and have some fun.鈥

Truthfully, for most of us, the shirt that we feel most comfortable in is, and always will be, the ultimate running shirt. Not nanotech, lab-engineered comfortable, but 鈥淗ey, this is me鈥 comfortable. That might mean a baggy cotton tee, a high school era cutoff, or a vintage basketball jersey. Comfort does not come in a singular box.

Sure, chafing is a scourge on the planet (this is one of the world鈥檚 only universal truths), but most of us simply are not out there pushing the technological limits of our sportswear on our morning jog. We are, however, fighting to get out the door in the first place, battling a laundry list of excuses (and a few sore muscles) in the process. Frankly, adding a uniform to the mix just gives me one more reason to hit the snooze button.

Running is a pure pursuit: one foot in front of the other for as long as we can. The rest? That鈥檚 all extra. Let鈥檚 start treating it as such. This isn鈥檛 hockey鈥攖here are no pads, no jock straps, no laser-cut helmet designs or skates making the millisecond difference in our daily neighborhood loop. Let鈥檚 keep it simple, folks. If putting on a familiar shirt gets you to the start line, that鈥檚 a win that even the most highly specialized workout top can never deliver. So get out there and let that garment game fly.

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My Personal Triathlon Consists of These Three Events /culture/opinion/ridiculous-triathlon-alternatives/ Tue, 01 Jul 2025 23:17:02 +0000 /?p=2709643 My Personal Triathlon Consists of These Three Events

Swim, bike, run? Boring. Our editors propose these multisport extravaganzas instead.

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My Personal Triathlon Consists of These Three Events

I have two nice things to say about triathlons, which is that they’re long, and they’re difficult. (Yes, they’re also steeped in history and tradition, and the .) But, Lordy鈥攃ould the sporting gods have picked a more somber collection of events? Swimming, biking, and running are about as basic as a pumpkin spice latte. Even the Olympics has skateboarding these days.

While I have nothing but respect for anyone who would even contemplate completing a triathlon, many of us at 翱耻迟蝉颈诲别听have a hard time doing the same, grueling activity for hours at a time. The rest of us have bad knees. Besides, triathlons have been around since the seventies. Isn’t it about time to change things up?

So, the editors鈥攑hilosophers that we are鈥攑ut our heads together to come up with some alternatives. So far, not a single national sporting committee has taken us up on any of them. But, as always, we’re just going to assume we’re ahead of our time.

Here are eight multisport linkups we’d much rather participate in than a full triathlon.

A group of people roller blading along an asphalt road.
Rollerblading is serious business. (Photo: Finden Marketing via Unsplash)

Spending all day in the sun is fine鈥攗nless you have skin as fair and burn-prone as I do. As an alternative, I propose we move the whole triathlon business underground. Call it the Moley Trinity. Competitors will connect a route, a spelunking adventure, and an in a terrible, beautiful, and highly abrasive linkup of semi-subterranean sports.
Corey Buhay, interim managing editor, 国产吃瓜黑料

I suck at swimming, which is why I鈥檝e never tried a tri. And a stubborn piriformis injury has put the kaibosh on competitive trail running. So if I could pick any three triathlon events, I鈥檇 keep biking in there, but make it mountain biking. Then I鈥檇 add in 10 laps on a , and I鈥檇 top it off with 60 minutes of jump roping鈥攎y favorite form of cardio.
Maya Silver, editor-in-chief, Climbing

Hike, pick a gallon of wild berries, then bake them into a pie. Points for time, but your final confection will also be judged in the style of The Great British Bake-Off. The hardest part is collecting enough berries without eating them all straight off the bush.
Zoe Gates, senior editor, Backpacker

Slam a gas-station four-pack of Red Bull on your way to the lake. When you arrive, grab your SUP and paddle until your arms give out. Finally, snag a prime shoreline spot and hang your hammock. Whoever dozes off first wins. (Can鈥檛 fall asleep? That鈥檚 God, or maybe the Red Bull, telling you that you haven鈥檛 paddled enough.)
Adam Roy, editor-in-chief, Backpacker

Bike, to inline skate, to swim鈥攖he ultimate urban tri. The biggest crux here is transporting your skates via bike. Do you tie them around your neck, throw them in a pack, or swing them off the handle bars? The strategy we have tried is attempting to ride the bike with blades already on. Would not recommend.
Kade Krichko, contributing editor, 国产吃瓜黑料

A competitor takes part in the World Bog Snorkelling Championships
A competitor takes part in the World Bog Snorkelling Championships, which is held in along a 55-meter peat bog trench. Snorkels and flippers are mandatory. (Photo: Getty Images)

Okay, one more idea. Allow me to pitch you Mudsport, a sloppy six-mile mud run, followed by an intense but sporting game of , with a stretch of highly competitive to cap it off.
Corey Buhay, interim managing editor, 国产吃瓜黑料

I鈥檓 13 weeks postpartum, so any kind of exercise is an accomplishment these days. I propose a tri for new parents: Drink a full cup of coffee before it gets cold. Then pop your child into a stroller and jog to the nearest kid-friendly attraction so you can push the stroller around while your little one snoozes peacefully, appreciating none of it鈥.all on wildly limited sleep while nursing as needed. Bonus points if you have to change a blowout along the way.
Abigail Wise, brand director, 国产吃瓜黑料

I鈥檓 a great swimmer and used to be on a swim team, but if I never touch water again鈥攎inus showering and bubble baths鈥擨鈥檇 be OK with that. My preferred triathlon consists of a morning session spent training my friend鈥檚 kitten to wear a harness so that he can join me on my trail walks, taking said kitten on my favorite 2.3-mile trek, and then parking my car in front of the beach for a nap.
Ayana Underwood, senior health editor, 国产吃瓜黑料

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When Is It OK to Rescue a Wild Animal? /culture/opinion/wild-animal-rescue/ Sat, 14 Jun 2025 09:39:17 +0000 /?p=2706564 When Is It OK to Rescue a Wild Animal?

Wildlife professionals want us all to leave injured animals alone鈥攅ven if that means they die. But do we lose a piece of our humanity by refusing to intervene?

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When Is It OK to Rescue a Wild Animal?

This winter a woman in Steamboat Springs spotted an elk on her property. When she went out to take a picture, the animal startled and ran into a gully where it got stuck in snow up to its neck. Convinced the , she called game wardens, who told her to leave the animal alone. By morning, she鈥檇 gathered friends to dig it out, but it died before they could help.

The story illustrates a longstanding ethical dilemma. Many people, guided by truly good intentions, can鈥檛 stand to see an animal die, especially if their own actions鈥攍ike approaching the elk to take a picture鈥攁re what led to its predicament.聽 Even land managers will occasionally try to rehabilitate an animal that鈥檚 been hit by a car. However, this way of thinking is a slippery slope. A reasonable person could make the case that most frontcountry animal injuries are in some way caused by humans鈥攚hether that鈥檚 due to our encroachment on habitat, or climate change applying new and deadly pressure. But regardless of the cause of injury, wildlife professionals鈥攊ncluding rangers and wardens鈥攁re pretty firm about letting nature take its course, even if that means the animal dies. After all, when one beast falls, another is fed.

It鈥檚 tempting to set such a black-and-white rule. It鈥檚 even more tempting to Monday-morning quarterback. Take one infamous case in which a do-gooder came across a lone shivering baby bison in Yellowstone. He loaded it into the back of his SUV and brought it to the rangers. As it turned out, the baby wasn鈥檛 actually abandoned. But now that it had taken a joyride in a Toyota Sequoia, its mother wouldn鈥檛 take it back, and given the near certainty of its violent death in the jaws of a predator, rangers instead chose to euthanize it. The good Samaritan was fined $119 for his efforts, and his empathy got the bison killed. Critics decried the driver. They also called the case clear-cut, even though it may not have been to the do-gooder at the time.

baby bison in yellowstone national park
Putting a baby bison in the back of a car may be one of the most notorious forms of misguided animal rescue鈥攂ut maybe we shouldn’t be too quick to judge. (Photo: Morgan Newnham via Unsplash)

Other cases are much murkier. My wife worked for years as a field biologist. On one gig, her team was installing small sections of fence around young aspen trees in the backcountry of a national park to cage them off and test how much elk were browsing. But one day a rutting elk scooped up the metal fencing with its antlers where it got entangled. When the cage then flopped onto the elk鈥檚 back, it started, and sprinted out, thinking it was being attacked by some beast it could not see.

What to do? Obviously this was a case where human activity had put the elk in danger. It had no hope of removing the cage from its antlers. The researchers dropped their work and ran after the elk, also radioing game wardens to explain the situation. By the time the wardens arrived with their tranquilizer darts, the elk had wisely waded into the middle of the river鈥攖his is how the animals escape predators. To tranquilize the elk in the river would cause it to drown. So everyone sat down and waited an hour or so. Finally when the elk emerged, they tranquilized it, and were able to remove the metal cage and let the elk go on its merry way. A successful outcome. And yet one might wonder how many federal dollars were spent on this single mission, and astutely note that this kind of treatment must be the exception, not the rule.

So here鈥檚 another case from my wife鈥檚 annals of animal rescue. She and her partner were live-trapping mice for another experiment. But somehow two ground squirrels found their way into the traps. In the cold Montana summer night, they鈥檇 gone into torpor, a sort of short-term hibernation from hypothermia and dehydration. Left to the elements, the squirrels would probably have died. So these young wildlife-lovers took action: They unzipped parkas and each placed a squirrel against their belly to warm them up. It seemed sensible enough. But as they hiked on to the next trap her friend began to wonder aloud. 鈥淚 think there鈥檚 something dangerous about squirrels, but I can鈥檛 quite recall what it is.鈥 He snapped his fingers. 鈥淣ow I remember: They carry bubonic plague!鈥

The thought of a sharp-fanged and sharp-clawed rodent coming back to life in immediate proximity to their internal organs made the two rethink their plan. So they returned to their truck, and lay the two squirrels on the driver鈥檚 seat where the early morning sunlight through the windshield heated the torpored furballs. They shut the door and went back to work. Returning a few hours later, the creatures were. . . gone? Later when they returned the truck to the yard, the mechanics discovered the squirrels had somehow found their way out of the cab and into the undercarriage. While the mechanic was able to dislodge the animals, it鈥檚 safe to say that this intervention may not have served the squirrels well.

I think it鈥檚 worth discussing how these rescue attempts affect humans, too. Compared with a century or two ago, humans now have virtually no contact with non-domesticated animals. (We have very little contact with farm animals, either.) And I think if we believe that other species have a right to exist, then it might be useful鈥攅ven profound鈥攖o once in a while brush up against them. I don鈥檛 accept the view that 鈥渢he environment鈥 is entirely separate from civilization, or that humans should never disturb or visit it. I tend to think humans can鈥攁nd should鈥攈ave some sort of connection to other species besides donating money to some group that will protect them. Practicing kindness to another species is important. And while I get that it鈥檚 possible that our kindness may actually harm that species, it鈥檚 important to try (within reason), nonetheless. It reminds us that we, too, are part of creation.

Here鈥檚 an analogy. In the modern welfare state, citizens basically agree to pay taxes in order to distribute their wealth to those who need it. This approach has in many European nations. But it also relieves many individuals from the ancient act of charity鈥攐f offering an actual hand to the poor, tired, and downtrodden. So while this technocratic approach produces better results (look at the in the United States compared to Europe) something immeasurable is lost when so many people no longer feel the need to give personally to those in need. When such contributions are just deducted from your paycheck, we become disconnected from the act of charity. We lose the opportunity to give back in the way that that is taught by most world religions, as well as the sort of social-class intermingling that might, in theory, make for better democracies.

person feeding a squirrel
Feeding wildlife? Not ethical. But rescuing injured wildlife could be a different story鈥攄epending on where you draw the ethical boundaries. (Photo: SH Wang via Unsplash)

To bring the analogy back to animals: wildlife professionals have determined that regular humans should leave nature alone. Let the rangers and wardens figure it out, they say. And yet, some basic part of our humanity is lost if, coming upon a bird with a broken wing, we just walk past, thinking, I must not meddle with the environment. But always deferring to the government professionals can place us in an ethically dubious position. We may end up feeling powerless, unable to perform an instinctual act of kindness. At some level, training ourselves to turn a blind eye to pain has to be bad for the soul.

As for the woman who watched the elk die in the snowdrift near her house: I understand why the warden advised her to leave the animal alone. Elk can be dangerous if they feel they are in danger, striking with their huge hooves and potentially endangering their human rescuers. In any case, the agencies decided to let the elk die, and it did. My point isn鈥檛 to say the agencies made the wrong decision, just that their decision doesn鈥檛 appear to be ethically superior to that of the woman who eventually (and unsuccessfully) attempted to save it.

I also feel that her instinct to try to gather her neighbors to dig out the elk would likely have forged a connection to the nonhuman world that is rare and precious. Remember that humans lived for millennia in intimacy with wild animals, both as hunters and as prey. Maybe we are safer if we stay away from injured animals. But surely something has been lost by rupturing that connection.

Finally, most people who鈥檝e been watching the state of the planet for the past decades are feeling a strong sense of guilt. Humans are causing the extinction of hundreds of other species. It may be easy to ridicule the man who packed a baby bison into his car. It may not have been an educated decision, or even necessarily the right one. But let鈥檚 not belittle his motives.


Mark Sundeen teaches environmental writing at the University of Montana. Got an ethical question of quandary of your own? Send it to sundogsalmanac@hotmail.com.

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Op-Ed: Public Lands Are Under Attack. State Leaders Should Protect them. /culture/opinion/deb-haaland-public-lands-protection/ Mon, 28 Apr 2025 22:15:09 +0000 /?p=2701941 Op-Ed: Public Lands Are Under Attack. State Leaders Should Protect them.

Former Interior Secretary Deb Haaland believes that elected officials at the state level should use their power to protect the country鈥檚 public lands from drilling and development

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Op-Ed: Public Lands Are Under Attack. State Leaders Should Protect them.

From 2021 until 2024, while I was Secretary of the Interior, we worked to forge stability, create jobs in a clean energy economy, conserve more lands and waters for future generations, and secure clean air and water for communities in every corner of the country.

We treated everyone with dignity and respect鈥攙alues that New Mexicans live by. Today, the work we accomplished, alongside conservationists, farmers, ranchers, Tribes, rural communities, and cities is under attack.

In a time of questions and uncertainty in Washington, governors around the country will be on the front lines of defense against this president鈥檚 reckless firing of federal workers, massive cuts to services that people rely on, and general chaos. The Trump administration is vigorously defending its actions in court, and if they鈥檙e allowed to stand, the harm will only grow.

When wildfires strike, there will now be fewer federal firefighters to put out the flames. Jobs and livelihoods in the outdoor recreation sector are at risk. Families who plan to visit Carlsbad Caverns in New Mexico, Yellowstone in Wyoming, and other national parks will encounter longer wait times and possibly limited hours.

When folks are looking to gather firewood on national forest lands, they could have a harder time contacting support staff. Veterans who seek solace on our public lands might not have the access they once did. Hunters may notice that their organizations are losing funding, and their hunting grounds slowly disappearing and being sold off to the highest bidder.

I鈥檓 running for Governor of New Mexico because leadership matters.

Governors will need to meet this moment with bold and steady leadership, and I will be a Governor who stands up for New Mexicans and the public lands that we love. While I was Secretary of the Interior, we made tremendous strides to address climate change, expand access to public lands, address drought, and manage resources responsibly. This was all done with clear direction and respect for the workforce tasked with implementing our goals. We tried new things and shot for the moon, and we did it all hand-in-hand with the people most impacted.

We created meaningful change because we were a serious agency led by, frankly, serious people. The Interior was one of the largest agencies in the federal government with nearly 70,000 dedicated employees鈥攑ark rangers, firefighters, climate scientists, biologists, and more. These are the jobs in New Mexico that kids deserve to have when they鈥檙e grown.

As I travel around my home state listening to communities, I鈥檓 hearing time and again that people are afraid. I鈥檝e met federal workers who were worried about their jobs, seniors anxious about Medicare, veterans concerned about VA services, and families worried about their kids鈥 schools. Trump and Elon Musk are striking fear into our communities while failing to deliver the things they promised.

Governors have the obligation to protect our communities. I know I will carry the weight of standing up in the face of these attacks, but it鈥檚 a weight I will happily carry because I believe in a future where we all share in New Mexico鈥檚 bounty and success. It鈥檚 a vision that has sometimes been out of reach, but I believe that with my experience, we can change the system to work for the people.

Similar to the way I changed the system at the Department of the Interior by bringing Tribal Nations and local communities in as active participants in stewarding our lands, I will make that a reality for traditional communities and Tribes in New Mexico. I will also collaborate with other governors who recognize the threats posed by this administration and with the state attorney general to pursue legal routes to fight for the protection of our lands. I hope and expect that governors鈥攁s chief executives of states鈥攚ill work together to share and learn from their successes and find opportunities to pursue new solutions. We must recognize the urgency of this moment and lock arms against these very real threats.

As governor, I will make sure New Mexico鈥檚 state parks are maintained and accessible, and I鈥檒l work to break down barriers to access these treasures. If the national parks and other federal lands in New Mexico suffer further staffing and resource cuts, I will explore ways for the state to step up and provide support to keep federal lands safe and available. I will continue efforts to recruit and hire federal workers who have lost their jobs so that they can continue to share their valuable skills and training.

I鈥檓 running for governor because the experience I gained leading a federal department and working in Congress will help working people. And I will stand alongside all of the governors who will be on the frontlines to protect our beautiful landscapes, outdoor traditions, and natural resources for future generations.


Deb Haaland served as the 54th Secretary of the United States Department of the Interior.

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Skiing Isn鈥檛 Just a Luxury Experience. It鈥檚 a Dangerous Sport. /culture/opinion/skiing-dangerous-sport/ Fri, 08 Mar 2024 21:25:01 +0000 /?p=2658655 Skiing Isn鈥檛 Just a Luxury Experience. It鈥檚 a Dangerous Sport.

More resorts should place as much marketing effort on safety as they do on selling tickets

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Skiing Isn鈥檛 Just a Luxury Experience. It鈥檚 a Dangerous Sport.

On January 10, at Palisades Tahoe, an avalanche ripped down G.S. Bowl, a popular run right beneath the famed KT-22 chair, killing one person and trapping many others. As is almost always the case with inbounds avalanches, none of the skiers and snowboarders who were buried did anything wrong. And while investigations are ongoing, Palisades鈥 snow safety professionals鈥攖he patrollers that risk their lives in the predawn gloom tossing hand charges and ski cutting slopes to release avalanches before the public arrives鈥攑robably also did their jobs to the best of their abilities.

After a multiple-fatality slide at Silver Mountain, Idaho, in 2020, I gave some general advice about how to protect yourself inbounds. I also explained why inbounds avalanches happen in 2019 after a similar tragedy at Taos Ski Valley, in New Mexico. The unfortunate reality is that avalanche science is pretty good at assessing the likelihood of slides, but it cannot predict exactly where and when a slope will break loose. Nor will we ever know with total certainty that avalanche terrain鈥攁ny ungroomed slope above 30 degrees, which includes pretty much everything above a blue square in the west鈥攊s 100 percent safe to ski. Mitigation doesn鈥檛 work that way. Resort snow safety teams live in a continuum where they can always be good, but they can never be perfect. In a 100 percent safe scenario, KT-22 would never spin.

The fatal slides at Palisades, Silver Mountain, and Taos highlight a disconnect in ski resort messaging that I’ve witnessed throughout my lifelong involvement with snow sports, including 25 years covering the subject as a journalist. Time and again, I see skiing marketed to the masses as , or as a luxury lifestyle choice for the wealthy. The truth, of course, is that skiing can be hazardous, and sometimes it can be deadly. But rarely have I ever seen resorts communicate the dangers of the sport to customers with the same vigor as they do plugging the fluffy accouterments. Ski resorts should start treating customers like adults, and stop pretending skiing and snowboarding are as safe as a fancy cruise鈥攎inus the hot tub norovirus.

Crews mitigate avalanche danger below a ski lift
Crews blast for avalanches at Palisades Tahoe after the deadly slide on January 10. (Photo: Associated Press)

There are reasons why approachability eclipses danger in resort messaging, of course. During my time covering the sport I’ve regularly seen executives promoted to the C-suite from marketing and guest services positions, but rarely have I seen ski patrollers rise to the same levels. Take a look at bios for executives at the two biggest resort companies in the world鈥 and 鈥攊f you want proof.

Yes skiing can be family-friendly and luxurious, but it is also risky to varying degrees. That鈥檚 true of that blue run you just dragged your rookie boyfriend up without a lesson, and it鈥檚 also true of the steep avalanche terrain that you鈥檙e standing on top of waiting for the rope to drop. After a few flurries of inbounds avalanche fatalities in the past two decades, I believe most seasoned skiers and snowboarders understand the avalanche risk. Everyone else should read the lengthy online waiver that greets you before you buy your pass.

Except nobody reads waivers. I鈥檝e addressed the need for skiers to be a bit more self-reliant in previous columns. But I think that marketing departments for ski resorts also need to do a better job of acknowledging and even鈥攅gads鈥攁ddressing the risks: collisions on overcrowded slopes; long falls on iced-over runs; tree well suffocation; and yes, inbounds avalanches. Scan headlines from local newspapers over the past few months you will see of at North American resorts. Communicating the dangers of skiing in an adequate way will require a cultural shift at many resorts. That’s because the business model is about attracting the highest volume of customers and resorts don鈥檛 want to scare anyone off.

Resort skiing has always been a volume play. Lift lines in the seventies were routinely an hour long. They used to sell hot dogs and beer as you waited, and you had time for a second beer. Today, the lines move faster, but the resort conglomerates carry on that volume-first tradition by selling cheap season passes. I鈥檝e argued in the past that those products are good because they can help bring new users, and maybe someday, diverse users, into skiing and snowboarding, which otherwise would have gone into a steady decline. But high volume comes at the cost of the experience and the safety of the guests. Ask any patroller at a resort where you feel as though you鈥檙e dodging other humans like bamboo gates why most accidents happen, and off the record he or she will say, “It鈥檚 the crowding.”

Again, I鈥檓 not calling out any specific ski resort here, certainly not Palisades, which, besides a misguided notion to rebrand one of the steepest ski areas in North America as a family ski hill about a decade ago has a well-earned extreme vibe and, last I heard, one of the best snow safety teams in the business. (I was complicit in that softer marketing. I produced their marketing magazine, which was full of low angle skiing and snot-nosed kids and by edict from above none of the steep skiing the mountain is famous for.) What I鈥檓 calling out is this: Resorts can feel free to market the that they love so much in these days of massive income inequality, but they also need to message that skiing comes with challenges and struggle and self reliance and, yes, risk. Even mellow resort skiing requires as much dedication to skills training and fitness as mountain biking and surfing. Backcountry skiing comes with the gravitas of whitewater, big wave surfing, and alpinism. Skiing on avalanche terrain鈥攏o matter if it’s inbounds or out鈥攕hould take years of skills development to get to that level. Skiing and snowboarding are epic because the sports beat you down. Mountains are iconic because they鈥檙e unforgiving.

Some resorts already get that. They tend to be the ones that market themselves as ski 鈥渁reas鈥 not ski 鈥渞esorts.鈥 Arapahoe Basin in Colorado, which was just purchased by Alterra, and cut skier volume a few years ago to preserve the experience, is one. I hope that management style will continue. Fernie, which is avalanche-challenged by slopes above the resort, is another. Alta, Utah, the birthplace of snow science and avalanche mitigation in the U.S., is a third. When the Alta sheriff tells you to move your car because it will get buried overnight, you tend to pay attention. In Europe, everyone knows that if you ski off-trail you are in the backcountry and you could die.

The corresponding spatial awareness, mountain sense, and self reliance you see at burlier ski areas can and should be encouraged everywhere. When Bridger Bowl, Montana, first opened the short and steep zones that runs above the lower ski area, they required skiers to carry avalanche beacons鈥攖he rest of the avy gear is advised. They carried on that tradition when they opened the steep Slushman鈥檚 zone in the 2000s. There鈥檚 a similar deal at Delirium Dive in Canada鈥檚 Sunshine Village. There鈥檚 only one way to access that legit extreme terrain, and you need gear and a partner to do it. Crystal Mountain, Washington, has a related, if grayer, policy for its Southback zone which they mitigate for avalanches but recommend skiing with avy gear and a partner at the access gates.

My favorite ski area in North America is Silverton Mountain in Colorado. The year Jenny and Aaron Brill opened Silverton, I skied and reported a story there for Powder magazine. The wider industry and avalanche community was predicting doom for the enterprise because every inch of Silverton Mountain is avalanche terrain in one of the most slide-prone parts of the world. The Brills sold Silverton recently, but the ski area they founded succeeded through endless mitigation, a guided-only policy in mid-winter, and a no-bullshit attitude that emphasized showing respect to the mountain. At Silverton, the guides will ridicule you rather than let you get cavalier. This is both hilarious and necessary. When it comes to unguided skiing and snowboarding, Silverton customers treat the terrain like backcountry. At Silverton, you feel a little nervous twinge before you ski. We shouldn鈥檛 turn that switch off at fancier resorts just because they have marble counters in the shitters.

It will likely never happen because of legal concerns and greed, but in my worldview, many North American ski areas should require avy gear and partners in certain zones. The requirement brings a lot of benefits. For one, it can reduce the stigma or perceived stigma of carrying safety gear inbounds. In Utah recently during a big storm cycle, I watched a few locals snicker at some vacationers skiing with packs inbounds. Yeah, one skier had a shovel strapped to a hydration pack and didn鈥檛 have high style points, but his mindset was correct. When gear is required for certain zones, more guests will be wearing beacons in transmit mode. That鈥檚 an easy win. And second, like the strenuous hike up Aspen Highlands鈥 eponymous bowl, gear helps to filter skiers. Meaning, the people that probably shouldn鈥檛 be skiing your gnarliest terrain might think better of it.

The timing is right for this cultural shift. Backcountry skiing and snowboarding are no longer niche pursuits. There are enough skiers with gear and training to change how avalanche terrain is managed. Hell, while requiring gear won鈥檛 bring your ski area more cash, it will bring more cachet. You can market adventure again instead of pots of molten cheese and those hot stones they put on your back at the spa.

But the bigger benefit in nudging this cultural shift forward is that in carrying gear and trusting in a partner, skiers also learn to trust themselves. If we as skiers and snowboarders do that, then maybe the insanity of an inbounds powder day can move subtly in the direction of smarter skiing, with customers having conversations about the hazards, buddying up, poking around cautiously at times, and looking out for one another. That last bit might be wishful thinking. But even if all ski areas do is require safety gear and partners in certain zones, at the least we鈥檇 be a lot faster on the rescues.

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Tesla鈥檚 Stuck Cybertruck Was a Christmas Gift to the Internet /outdoor-gear/cars-trucks/teslas-stuck-cybertruck-was-a-christmas-gift-to-the-internet/ Mon, 18 Dec 2023 23:35:26 +0000 /?p=2656159 Tesla鈥檚 Stuck Cybertruck Was a Christmas Gift to the Internet

We hope you enjoy this more than Elon Musk did

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Tesla鈥檚 Stuck Cybertruck Was a Christmas Gift to the Internet

Tesla faced an avalanche of online mockery聽after a video was posted to Reddit on December 12 showing a prototype Cybertruck that had to be towed out of a snowy hillside. By a Ford, no less. The vehicle, carrying a solitary Christmas tree in its bed,聽lacked the traction to free itself from the slippery terrain聽in the Stanislaus national forest, despite running all-terrain tires that, per Tesla鈥檚 marketing,聽鈥

The Forest Service capitalized on the viral blunder by issuing a pithy public statement that proposed聽a partnership with Tesla to promote awareness and education of their motor vehicle use maps. 鈥淲e feel confident that had the driver of the Cybertruck had a better understanding of the topographical feature indicated on our maps, practiced Leave No Trace principles, and generally been more prepared, this whole incident could have been not only avoided, but also provided much-needed education to many new off-road users,鈥 said Stanislaus National Forest Supervisor Jason Kuiken in a

The聽maps, which the forest publishes online, illustrate which roads and trails motorized vehicles are allowed to use. If the road is out of bounds, it鈥檚 for good reason: the unsuspecting off-roader will likely get stuck.


by in

 

The video, which was shared widely on Reddit and Instagram, prompted vitriol about Tesla, its founder Elon Musk, and San Francisco drivers infamous for misbehaving on snow. Each year, the hordes of fintech and coding bros descend upon the Sierra Nevada and wreak havoc upon small mountain towns, these commenters say.

It seems they don鈥檛 teach comp-sci students in systems architecture classes that 80 percent of any vehicle鈥檚 traction capability comes from its tires. But maybe the driver鈥檚 18.5-inch TV in the middle of the dashboard became a distraction, and led them to drive off off the road and into a ravine.

The vehicle was a prototype, so it may not have been equipped with the Cybertruck鈥檚 production tires, but taking it off-road in the snow was a particularly boneheaded move if the product tester knew the truck was under-equipped.聽Tesla, who blew up its PR department back in 2020, has not commented on the incident. For their part, the National Forest spokespeople 聽they were dead serious.

A better driver would have aired down the tires, which would lengthen the contact point and make the tires more flexible, or brought a traction device like Maxtrax. This driver was probably more focused on adding meme coins to his crypto portfolio than planning ahead and preparing for an excursion into the forest.

It鈥檚 heartening to see someone make use of the Stanislaus National Forest鈥檚 free , even if the tree itself will probably be decorated with benign ornaments that won鈥檛 offend whoever AirBnBs their Tahoe cabin that they visit once a year.

We hope the tech company takes the national forest up on its offer. It could use the PR, and perhaps engineers will聽add grippier tires to the next fleet of Cybertrucks. For an upcharge.

Tesla鈥檚 marketing materials say the truck was built to perform on 鈥渁ny planet.鈥 Maybe it would鈥檝e gotten better traction under Jupiter鈥檚 gravity.

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Murmurs from a Token Female Ski Shop Employee聽 /culture/opinion/murmurs-from-a-token-female-ski-shop-employee/ Thu, 21 Sep 2023 22:39:11 +0000 /?p=2646621 Murmurs from a Token Female Ski Shop Employee聽

As a woman in a male-dominated sport, knowing your worth as a ski shop employee is essential

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Murmurs from a Token Female Ski Shop Employee聽

Working as the minority female amongst a varsity team of alpine jocks can be difficult. Some days, you will feel ignored or unheard and question whether you should wear a low-cut v-neck or your baggiest pair of Carhartt鈥檚 to balance out the lack of acknowledgment. On other days, you鈥檒l feel like you鈥檙e part of the band of brothers.

Yes, I know: Most shop boys aren鈥檛 judgmental bros. They want to play around with shiny objects and expensive toys and never give into the structure of a 9-to-5 salaried job. Relatable! It鈥檚 not their fault their ideas are being constantly reinforced by their male counterparts who have little to argue about other than the placement of the new retail racks or which idiot bought 500 units of Edgie Wedgies. Every once in a while, you get to listen to an emotionally charged debate over which technician is better at their job. (At this point, you should pat them on the head and give them a lollipop.)

However, being the token female, or even one of three women in the ski showroom, you must quickly find your niche and establish your dominance amidst a sea of salty bros that have a hard time hearing a woman鈥檚 voice over their daily monologue of sales goals, humble brags, and poop jokes. To establish your own Shop Cred, you鈥檒l need to back up 鈥渢hat pretty face鈥 with equal parts intelligence, kindness, and a thick skin coated with sassy comebacks to protect perceived weaknesses that may be exposed to the elements.

As with most male species, they have a limited comfort level with gray area topics and opinion-based conversations. Here are some tips to get you started.

Comments You Should Steer Clear Of:

Your feelings and emotions.

鈥淒o you think he鈥檚 hot?鈥

鈥淲ould these bibs look cute on me?鈥

鈥淚 mean yeah, the topsheet graphic sort of matters.鈥

鈥淚 do not enjoy Coors Light.鈥

Safe Topics:

Farts

The weather

What to order for lunch

Freeride World Tour

Motorsports

The Token Female will likely run into a few mansplaining situations while at the ski shop. The term mansplaining was derived from the male species鈥 frequent assumption that a woman does not understand something a male might understand. Often prompted by a simple question, the male engages in an unintentional yet compulsive desire to deliver an answer in a highly in-depth manner that is best suited for educating a 5th grader. Reactions from women trapped in a mansplain range from interest to annoyance to hot, silent fury.

鈥淪o, as the ski slides over snow you will begin to engage your knees and bend them enough to rotate the ski onto its edge, at which point the skis will carve in the direction you have bent your knees-鈥

鈥淚 didn鈥檛 ask how to ski鈥 I asked how the ski 鈥榮kis鈥欌︹

鈥淥h鈥 Like how it feels? Suuuuuuper surfy. You鈥檙e gonna love it.鈥

(Pat on the head, then lollipop, remember?)

A small but notable percentage of the 50-80 age group may converse with you exclusively to find an experienced male employee who can answer the same questions. But of course, a young girl such as oneself could not understand the complexities of a ski鈥檚 shape, structure, and composition! They will look straight through you as they meander towards the ski wall, floating on a cute little cloud of ignorance. I鈥檒l chalk this one up to generational differences.

On the opposite end of the customer inquiry spectrum is the elder who hasn鈥檛 skied in 25 years and is ready to pick the sport back up. This customer missed the time their beloved 210cm parabolic skis transformed into what used to be called waterskis. Their first steps back into a shop must be a shocking and confusing time, as you can imagine.

This customer presents the Token Female with a pivotal moment in her retail career. She must utilize the fundamental tactics of mansplaining to patiently describe new-age ideologies and technologies that said elder seemed to miss during the past two decades. Unlike the male, the female will offer a soft blow of information balanced with a gentile discussion of the changing times as she lends an ear to a 20-minute commemorative reflection of an intrepid adventure in the San Juans on their beloved set of Elan skis.

The action sports world may dominated by men, but that doesn鈥檛 mean our place in that world should be defined by gender. You will experience eye-rolling conversations no matter what field you work in. The key is to take the good, bad, and the ugly in with charisma, confidence, and pride. Ski fast, take chances, and the rest will follow! Just make sure to keep a few lollipops in the back pocket.

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A Very Dumb History of the Bicycle License /outdoor-adventure/biking/a-very-dumb-history-of-the-bicycle-license/ Wed, 22 Mar 2023 17:10:19 +0000 /?p=2624026 A Very Dumb History of the Bicycle License

Fueled by fearmongering and phony rhetoric, plans to force cyclists to obtain licenses are not new鈥攂ut they are ridiculous

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A Very Dumb History of the Bicycle License

Everybody has a dream鈥搒omething that motivates them, gets them out of bed in the morning, compels them to pick themselves up again even after they fall down face-first in the mud. For an athlete, it鈥檚 clinching a championship. For an actor it鈥檚 winning an Academy Award and haranguing everyone about your political beliefs. And for the bike-hater, it鈥檚 implementing some sort of scheme whereby people must obtain a license and registration in order to ride a bicycle.聽聽

Here in New York City, the latest attempt comes from State Senator Simcha Felder, who, in the wake of a recent bike-on-bike fender-bender in Brooklyn鈥檚 Prospect Park, made :

Speeding lawless bikers & E bikers cause accidents, injuries & fatalities with others using them to flee crimes. I proposed a package of bills to force all bikes & e scooters be registered, plated and insured. Right now, with no regulation, victims have no recourse! 1 Road-1 Rule

There is a time I鈥檇 have flown into a rage over such a proposal鈥攁s a cyclist, I recognize this plan as an obvious attempt to subvert the act of bicycling. As a human being, I also know that the best way to advance a moronic agenda that preempts critical thinking is to hide it under a thin veneer of fearmongering and concern for public safety. Cars are big, powerful, and potentially dangerous to everyone around them, so It makes sense that people operating them should have to not only to demonstrate a minimum level of proficiency, but also carry insurance in the event that a lapse in that proficiency results in their . Meanwhile, most people can鈥攁nd should!鈥攁ttain proficiency on a bicycle before they鈥檙e even tall enough to see over the dashboard of a car, so adding a layer of bureaucracy to all of that can only serve to discourage them from doing so and ultimately undermine the very accessibility that makes the bicycle the universal conveyance that it is.

Think about it: riding a bike is a fundamental part of growing up, as essential as learning to tie your shoe. So if you applied bicycle licensing logic to other basic life skills, you鈥檇 have a country full of 30 year olds who can鈥檛 make toast or do their own laundry because they couldn鈥檛 be bothered to get their government-mandated kitchen-use certification. (Sure, there are plenty of people like this already, but they鈥檙e mostly confined to colleges and universities.)

I still feel the same way about bicycle licenses鈥攚hich is that they鈥檙e stupid, in case that wasn鈥檛 clear)鈥攂ut do I feel differently about politicians who attempt to legislate them. This is because I find reassurance in history. See, bicycle licenses aren鈥檛 new; in fact they鈥檙e nearly as old as the bicycle itself. For example, back in 1896, noted how far the bicycle had come. 鈥淭hey were restricted to the use of pedestrian paths in the parks during certain hours, and for even this poor privilege a license was necessary in some cities.鈥 But eventually bicycles became ubiquitous, acceptance followed, and cycling ultimately enjoyed 鈥patronage by both sexes, among all classes.鈥

Meanwhile, in 1897, Chicago introduced an 鈥搘hich was declared unconstitutional and nullified shortly thereafter. One significant reason the bicycle licence wasn鈥檛 viable was that it was impractical to enforce: for example, what if someone rides into the city from someplace else where licenses aren鈥檛 required? A modern-day bicycle licensing scheme in New York City would be similarly stupid, especially when you consider that large swaths of the greater metropolitan area alone extend well into New Jersey and Connecticut, with thousands of riders a day crossing the George Washington Bridge to get to Manhattan.

Nevertheless, bicycle licensing schemes continued, though as the automobile rose to prominence they became less about raising revenue and more about shifting blame from drivers to bicyclists. See, at first cars were merely the playthings of the rich, and in New York City enforcement came from the 鈥溾濃攃ops on bicycles who chased reckless drivers. A reports that a New York City bicycle policeman named O鈥橞rien busted banker A.F. Kountze for speeding in an automobile and driving without a license. (He was doing 18mph.) Reading an article from 1950, however, we can see that the cars have won, drivers don鈥檛 want to be inconvenienced by other road users, and it鈥檚 children who have to pay the price鈥攏ot just in danger, but in personal freedom. 鈥Highway hazards created for motorists by the 18,000,000 bicycles in service in this country, mostly piloted by teen-agers, are an increasing problem in the campaign to reduce accident rates,鈥 says . 鈥淎s a remedy to this evil, Mr. Harvey (of the Association of Casualty and Surety Companies, dontcha know), urged that city and town officials adopt programs that call for registration and licensing of bicycles and the power to suspend and revoke these credentials and impound the vehicles.鈥

Municipalities listened, with predictable results. In 1957, half the kids who took one such test in the Long Island hamlet of Manhasset flunked. And that鈥檚 how you get children to take away their mobility until they鈥檙e old enough to drive

Today, bicycle licensing and registration has mostly disappeared from the American landscape, probably because the automobile鈥檚 victory has been so complete and total there鈥檚 no real need for the gratuitous subjugation measures in a post-automotive world. Honolulu bizarrely , but that鈥檚 about it. Nevertheless, every so often, when someone somewhere gets annoyed by a bicyclist, some pandering legislator raises the specter of bike licenses yet again, and Senator Felder is one of the more recent examples.

So what to do about it?聽 Well I say bring it on. Go ahead, make New Yorkers get bicycle licenses. Whatever, we鈥檝e seen it all before. No doubt the city and state will be be just as successful enforcing them as they are with , which are everywhere now, despite . And if drivers are freaking out about , just wait until they find out they鈥檒l also be underwriting a Department of Bicycle Registration, and an Office of Bicycle Enforcement, and a Bicycle Czar to run it all. It鈥檚 easy to complain about bicyclists until you actually have to pay for it. And if Felder actually does manage to get this thing passed, I鈥檒l just pull some kind of residency scam鈥攜ou know, . Having to dodge a bike license is a short-term inconvenience which would be worth it when the sheer ridiculous of it ultimately bites him in the ass.

So yeah, good luck with your lousy bicycle license.聽聽

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