For weeks early on in the country鈥檚 coronavirus quarantine, many of us听walked down our grocery stores鈥櫶齛isles with optimism, only to be . At the dismay of your backside, you may have asked: Is听there really not even single-ply听left?听
At first the听toilet-paper shortages were frustrating, albeit mildly amusing. That wore off quickly, leaving many in search of a solution.听In much of the world, that solution is the bidet, a time-tested cleaning device that鈥檚 only in earnest. By now you鈥檝e probably heard many things about them: they鈥檙e the affordable and environmentally friendly alternative to toilet paper, the spa experience for your bum that you never knew you wanted,听and听another example of how our country听is behind the times (pun intended).听These devices, from the simple to the 眉ber-fancy, easily attach to your toilet and blast your nether regions听with water instead of leaving you to smear your bum with processed trees.听
Most bidets are fixed to your home plumbing, but several companies make travel versions that you simply fill with water wherever and whenever you need to use them. That got us thinking about whether we鈥檝e been missing out on a better solution for backcountry bathroom breaks. In the woods, you鈥檙e often using leaves, a stick,听a smooth rock, or toilet paper听on your backside, and accepting those听as your only options.听Could a travel bidet change the game for outdoor pursuits?听
With a little extra time on our hands, we decided to test one out.
Our subject was the听, a portable model from a company that also makes bidets for your toilet.听The 11-ounce collapsible plastic and rubber contraption is readily听mistaken for a reusable water bottle听and comes attached to a key chain for听transport. The design is pretty basic. Simply expand the bottle, fill it up with water, turn it upside down, and it鈥檚 ready to go. A pop-up nozzle has three holes that direct the spray. Users position it near their bum and squeeze the easy-grip bottle to, as the company states, 鈥渢urn your poopy b-hole into a sparkling clean booty鈥 and 鈥渨ash your travel turds away.鈥 There鈥檚 no charging or batteries required. The Tushy Travel comes in black, white, and teal听and costs $29.听
OK, but does it actually work? I spent two weeks using the Tushy Travel and am still on the fence about it. While the brand鈥檚 on-toilet bidets can generate a strong stream of water听because they鈥檙e connected to your home鈥檚 water pipes, the Tushy Travel is limited in its cleaning powers because its force is generated by you squeezing the bottle. So in听instances that necessitate,听say, multiple wads of toilet paper, the Tushy Travel doesn鈥檛 quite have the force or water capacity to take care of those situations. (Many for babies, the elderly, the bedridden, and new moms).听
That said, if you鈥檙e dealing with a relatively clean drop-off, or if you simply听peed, then a travel bidet like this one can adequately remove residue and help clean your downstairs. And even for messier situations, the Tushy Travel does a good amount of the work for you,听reducing听the amount of toilet paper you need (or minimizing听the number of passes you have to make with a rock or a leaf) and leaving听you feeling significantly cleaner afterward. This is great when you鈥檙e camping, because you have to pack out all your bathroom trash.听
It鈥檚 definitely awkward (but possible) to avoid spraying water everywhere, even indoors, but a quick round of practice is key. As听with using a pee听funnel for the first time, I highly recommend听taking the bidet鈥檚 spray function for a practice run in the shower to dial in your aim before you do it outside where the stakes of getting your pants wet are higher. This also enables you to gain the confidence you鈥檒l need to use it in the wild where there are variables like wind听and poor lighting.听听
While I can鈥檛 in good faith recommend hauling a travel bidet up Denali in your sled, it鈥檚 definitely worth considering as a supplement to your kit for car camping, music festivals, or other exploits where weight isn鈥檛 a concern and hygiene is important.听Being able to poop comfortably in the woods (in a cathole or wag bag听and following Leave No Trace principles) and clean yourself up afterward听is a fundamental skill for听overnight outdoor excursions. And anything that makes going to the bathroom more pleasant听improves the whole outdoor experience.听