(Photo: Sinna Nasseri)
鈥淲e鈥檙e making a music video! I told you I sing, right?鈥
Of course she makes music鈥攁nyone who knows Alexi Pappas knows to always expect of her the least expected thing.
She lives in an idiosyncratic log cabin in L.A. with totems from her adventures in sport, cinema, and pop culture adorning every nook. And it鈥檚 not by coincidence that her home is at the base of what we locals call Dirt Mulholland, the city鈥檚 endurance aorta.
She鈥檚 jumping for joy, literally, and clapping too, up and down before launching her mighty mouse frame into mine. It鈥檚 a bit much for this Gen-X elder raised on cynicism. But Alexi鈥檚 exuberance is her default. I aspire to her lack of inhibition, and wonder to myself what it would feel like to experience joy so spontaneously.
Alexi knows this about me. I鈥檝e known her long enough to know she understands people. This is someone who leads with empathy. Who accepts people for exactly who they are but also has the intuition to know what a person needs even when they don鈥檛鈥攁nd then, without agenda, just fills that need.
When it comes to Alexi Pappas鈥攖his pixie powerhouse who wears wondrousness like haute couture鈥none of this is an act.
Sure, costumes are involved. Like the uniform she wore in Rio to represent Greece in the 10,000 meters, an Olympic dream forever memorialized by the Olympic rings tattooed just inside her right bicep. There are also costumes that come with the characters she plays in feature films like Tracktown, Olympic Dreams, and Not an Artist.
Then there鈥檚 the costume Alexi is perhaps best known for, the one she debuted at the New York City Marathon in 2021. She didn鈥檛 plan to wear a costume鈥攕he planned to race. It鈥檚 just that her body had other plans.
I met Alexi for the first time in December of the previous year, surprised that she arrived at my podcast studio on crutches. Fearful of appearing weak, a perception she was convinced would derail her track and field career, Alexi asked that we take her injury off the podcast table. I agreed, but I couldn鈥檛 dismiss the dissonance on display鈥攁 gap between the wisdom and positivity she exuded in our conversation and the fear that compelled her to keep her ailment private. This is a costume I鈥檝e seen before. To one extent or another, it鈥檚 one we all wear, myself included. But experience has taught me that life disfavors dissonance鈥攁nd will always create a circumstance that will compel us to disrobe.
Alexi almost pulled out of the marathon. Instead, she considered the marathon an art project.
If there is a definition of the modern athlete it is this鈥攁n ethos, a way of being in relationship with sport and our authentic self, which allows us to connect more truthfully with others.
Alexi鈥檚 tutu-twirling positivity should not be confused with Pollyanna, nor her quirky insights with naivet茅. Because beneath the glitter, there鈥檚 a quiet ferocity to her that often goes unnoticed.
鈥淚 think people underestimate you,鈥 I taunt, well aware that those who do, do so at their peril. 鈥淒oes that bother you?鈥 I ask.
鈥淣o, I love it!鈥 Meaning, this is a power she leverages.
Alexi鈥檚 tutu-twirling positivity should not be confused with Pollyanna, nor her quirky insights with naivet茅. Because beneath the glitter, there鈥檚 a quiet ferocity to her that often goes unnoticed.
And herein lies a conundrum I鈥檓 trying to better understand, how to square this human who leads with vulnerability, who can鈥檛 wait to tell me about all things that terrify her, with the other Alexi I know, the killer competitor who refuses to let fear interfere with doing hard things. The confident Olympian that is so good at so many seemingly unrelated things, and goes after all of them with well-honed intentionality.
This is what drew me to invite Alexi on my podcast in the first place. Who is this athlete who can also write screenplays, poetry, and a bestselling memoir? These days she鈥檚 working on a loosely autobiographical animated series she created with comedian Michelle Wolf, a scripted series set in the Olympic Village with Oscar-nominated screenwriter Lesley Paterson, and a movie shot at the Paris Olympics starring her and YouTuber Andrew Callaghan.
And she hosts a podcast called Mentor Buffet, featuring diverse guests sharing insights about influential people in their lives.
What Alexi wants is for everyone to experience their version of what she has been able to do. To stop asking for permission to be who they want to be, and instead take ownership for becoming it, whatever that 鈥渋t鈥 is.
鈥淲hen is it going to be acceptable for women to ball off-court?鈥 she asks.
This is a good question. I don鈥檛 have a good answer. I suspect it will come sooner the more women and girls do what Alexi did, which is to recast themselves鈥攆rom their pre-assigned roles to starring ones based on scripts of their own design.
Much ink has been devoted to the rise of the modern athlete. But I can鈥檛 think of a single person more deserving of this moniker than Alexi, a hybridized multi-hyphenate if there ever was one.
鈥淲hat does the phrase 鈥榤odern athlete鈥 mean to you?鈥 I ask.
鈥淭he modern athlete understands sport is a starting point for self-discovery, not the end,鈥 she says.
In the curious case of Alexi Pappas, it鈥檚 all about curiosity鈥攁bout yourself, other people, and what can be discovered by welcoming into your life the unknown. To be a modern athlete, all you have to do is decide to be one鈥攁nd start.
鈥淚 just can鈥檛 wait until it鈥檚 cool again to be earnest, cool again to try,鈥 she says to me before I leave the cabin.
Her eyes sparkle. And just like that, she鈥檚 clapping again.